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 Post subject: SFS Pile of absolute cack!!
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 2:22 pm 
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My first SFS guys, be gentle..

I was on my way to work last week, mining my own business, when I saw this car in a petrol station just around the corner from the office. I almost crashed into the pumps as I drove in because of it. As I was inside the guy tried to leave and the god-awful sound it was making got the attention of the whole forecourt, not to mention the smoke coming from under the bonnett!! :shock:

So I followed it as it limped to a nearby industrial estate (leaving an oil-trail) to arrive HERE!!! Image
I sat in the car giggling for a few minutes and while he went into the office I took the opportunity to get these SFS pics and chat to the nice engineers at VOSA. They couldn't believe this had been brought for it's roadworthyness inspection. :wa: :wa: :rofl: :rofl:
Flush boot....nice
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Bonnet bulge....check
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Intercooler......oh yes
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Super slick bodykit.......pfft
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Custom paint job
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Bespoke interior
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Wide flared arches
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Panel alignment by a blind cunt!
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Mean rear mirror warrior
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Side exit exhaust
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:shock: :shock:
It seems the whole of the VOSA garage came out to see this and they were all laughing. The main tester didn't want to be in a picture with it.... Apparently it has a Cosworth engine but that doesn't help when there's brake fluid leaking everywhere and the prop is grinding against the chassis.

It was seriously so bad that they slapped a prohibition order on it and told him it could only leave on a trailer :rofl: :wa: :rofl: :shed: :shed:

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 2:38 pm 
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what. the. fuck?

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The bone grating against the knob was an interesting sensation


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 2:59 pm 
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Viva La Revolution
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Jesus, that re-defines 'hopeless optimism' doesn't it? :shock:

What the fuck was he thinking?

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:06 pm 
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Location: Helping students find books on sheep.
What craftsmanship on the errr, bonnet thing and the wings. You hardly notice the panel gaps either. Can this be nominated for SOTW even though it's not technically barry? It is an epic shed after all.

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21:04:09 [joylove] all this talk of babies has given me itchy ring
21:04:44 [joylove] I think it's a nervous reaction to bcome gay

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:12 pm 
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Dr.Taff wrote:
What craftsmanship on the errr, bonnet thing and the wings. You hardly notice the panel gaps either. Can this be nominated for SOTW even though it's not technically barry? It is an epic shed after all.


Find a make and model, and I'll think about it.

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[C20LETMINI] Go on, be a sheep like the rest of the lemmings
[Liam_Olf] Rovers. Just fucking don't.
[mikey_monkfish]I wouldn't rely on my brain

Realitysigs
[Venari] Mmm, the smell of rape.

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21:36:03 [DavidB] I never tried to actually take enough in to swallow it.
15:49:39 [WeirdNeville] I prefer the brown bits.
19:24:01 [Tbj] I want to fit a black shitter
12:06:11 [mikey_monkfish] I've got AIDS, but it's ok because it's the good type
13:36:18 [WeirdNeville] I've been pissed on. It's not too bad.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:13 pm 
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kidsinister wrote:
Jesus, that re-defines 'hopeless optimism' doesn't it? :shock:

What the fuck was he thinking?


To be fair, the driver/creator didn't look like the thinking type.....

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:13 pm 
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I know that I couldn't build a car. Obviously this chap does not have the same level of self awareness.

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00:56:53 [mikey_monkfish] He pretended to be old when he was actually about 14.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:18 pm 
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It's that blocky and choppy, it looks like a model on Need For Speed 2 that's hit the wall a few times.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:20 pm 
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That is fucking fantastic.

As the op said in the Famine Q&A thread, it's not technically a road going/manufactured car, just a badly made kit car of some kind.

But, oh fuck is it good. I have never seen anything as shonky as that.

Great little story to accompany it too. I love the way that he probably drove and spluttered all the way, just to have to trailer it out of there.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:21 pm 
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I declare shenanigans - those inspectors all appear to be keeping a straight face!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:22 pm 
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Famine wrote:
Find a make and model, and I'll think about it.


Shames, chances of that happening are slim to none.

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Quote:
21:04:09 [joylove] all this talk of babies has given me itchy ring
21:04:44 [joylove] I think it's a nervous reaction to bcome gay

Pod sig: Mrs_Doyle> Just shove it in.
Taff Wagon Mk2Image Image


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:32 pm 
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What tickles me most is, he's remembered the rear number plate light. :lol:

"Yes... you won't be needing that, sir."

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What do I drive then?

don_choco wrote:
There is no honour in cycling.

The Daily Mash wrote:
"The key to human existence is pizza and happiness. Not vegetables and questions."


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 3:59 pm 
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It has a Vauxhall steering wheel...

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23:14:22 [piratetaco] Everyone with an impreza is a nazi. I can't be arsed to prove it cos i'm too busy masturbating.


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 4:02 pm 
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kidsinister wrote:
What tickles me most is, he's remembered the rear number plate light. :lol:

"Yes... you won't be needing that, sir."


That's actually a handle!!!!! I think it's to open the 'boot' it looks like one of them plastic twisty handle things....

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I confess. I once had Barry plans for my F-reg Orion. Thank god I grew up before it happened....


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 4:06 pm 
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SamuthNBS wrote:
It has a Vauxhall steering wheel...


a sign of fail second only to a "Selespeed" badge....

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tbj, in the chatroom, wrote:
The bone grating against the knob was an interesting sensation


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 4:41 pm 
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Ahh stonebridge business park, that brings back some memories.

Back to the car - i really don't know what to say. Like proper speachless.

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Elwood: It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
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 Post subject: Re: SFS Pile of absolute cack!!
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 4:56 pm 
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bah-reeeee wrote:
My first SFS guys, be gentle..


Gentle? Fuck off. You can have a good, hard POTW-nomination up the shitter for this.

Well spotted.

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"Old man got skill."
"... is an irritating waste of potential - like a used condom resting on your forehead." - Yahtzee "Zero Punctuation" Croshaw
"We all bloom towards the sunlight." - Lenny Henry
"The wheel wasn't made by some dude with a college degree, right?" - Bo Diddly
"Engineers like designing new parts, but we are trying to stop that." - Lewis Booth, CFO, Ford Motor Company

We wrote:
BlackSheep: *idly wonders if there are actually jobs out there that can only be done with your eyes closed and one hand behind your back...
Venari: BS> Whore.
BlackSheep: ven > bitch.
Venari: BS> That too.
Sureshot: Ven> Given Sheep's ability to break everything, er, no
Venari: SS> There are women who pay for that too.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 6:22 pm 
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aziraphale wrote:
SamuthNBS wrote:
It has a Vauxhall steering wheel...


a sign of fail second only to a "Selespeed" badge....


hey leave out mine is still working! (just) sometimes it does not like second gear granted but only sometimes!

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 6:32 pm 
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no8yogi wrote:
aziraphale wrote:
SamuthNBS wrote:
It has a Vauxhall steering wheel...


a sign of fail second only to a "Selespeed" badge....


hey leave out mine is still working! (just) sometimes it does not like second gear granted but only sometimes!


that will be recalibration time then at best.

at worst, new gearbox.

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tbj, in the chatroom, wrote:
The bone grating against the knob was an interesting sensation


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 6:41 pm 
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I see his attention to detail extended to getting his directional tyres on the right way round as well.

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Fatbaldbloke> Listen to the satnav not me.
Venari> I'm thinking of becoming a professional paedophile...... I can understand why people have children.


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